November 13, 2011

Turn around. I have to stab you in the back now.

SMSNP has migrated to Tumblr. Lemming us here:



October 26, 2011

Bertram. Bertie. Crack-puppy.

Not too long ago we welcomed another canine family member into the household: Bertram! Or as I like to call him on frequent occasions, Crack-puppy! Be jealous: 



August 25, 2011

The Quotebook

So I've had another installment of "This is not what I had in mind" in the works for, quite literally, months, but due to my crazy schedule and/or debilitating laziness, that post probably won't see the light of day...ever. Or perhaps if I hit an inspired streak, an optimistic someday.

Instead, I have decided to begin publishing selections from my very own, personal quotebook (no, this is NOT supposed to be one word, but I have made it so). Throughout my childhood and adolescence, I have always carried some variation of a quotebook with me at all times. Whether spiral-bound, composition, sketchbook, or tiny notes in a margin, I have somewhere kept track of the more amusing or insightful things I see and hear. The current edition happens to be a small Moleskine that I purchased particularly for quote-taking; it dates from August 18, 2010 to the present, and will, sadly, soon require replacing.

Here are some highlights (up to October) that I believe do not require extensive background or illumination:

"...he is mischievous in proportion to his cleverness." 
From the Allegory of the Cave.

"Just so you know, you sound like a fortune cookie."
-Criminal Minds

"The harder I work, the luckier I get."
-Sam Goldwyn
My current philosophy on life. 

"Quit harvesting me with your eyes!"
-The Simpsons
in re. Bart viewing Homer as an organ donor.

"When I woke up this morning...wait - just kidding - I never went to bed." 
-Emily Milton
Almost everything Miss Milton says is quotable. 

"'I'm going speed dating.'
'You mean you're dating on meth?'"

"Oh, monsters, why did I create you?"
-30 Rock
Easily my most favorite television show.

"'So I've been thinking about dead cats-'
'That doesn't sound like a good use of your time.'"

"Andrew was going to introduce me to a Rat Pack...they must be extraordinary rodents."
Besides being a decent crime show, my favorite part about Bones is Brennan's hilarious, out-of-context comments and quips. 

"E lascia pur grattar dov'รจ la rogha (And let them go ahead and scratch where it itches)!"
-Dante, The Inferno
It's nice to know that even Dante could throw some humor in there.

"If this seems disjointed, that's because it is. You're not imagining it." 
-Mr. Bone
Everything seemed to be falling apart, technology in particular, for Mr. Bone in a lecture that Monday morning. 

"How I'd love to get you on my couch." 
-Red Dragon
Only Anthony Hopkins can make a psychiatry joke so twisted.

"I read them [Twilight novels] because they're entertaining in the way that a car crash is entertaining."
-Madeline Warren

"My family has a psychiatrist on call. How normal can I be?"
-Charlie Bartlett

"I'm fit as a fucking fiddle." 
-Charlie Bartlett

"I'm pulling out the 'dead mom' card."
-Karen Sundell

"If you're going to hell, you might as well go with your friends!"
-Mr. Biga
This is said cheerfully as more gummy bears are lit on fire in a chemistry demonstration.

Check back later for another installment of hysterical and insightful quotes from my senior year.